Thursday, December 18, 2008

Some thoughts from Daniel Taylor

I have been reading a book by Daniel Taylor called Tell Me A Story: The Life-Shaping Power of Our Stories. It has been very "eye opening".

He wrote a couple of paragraphs that have made me think a ton and helped me immensely. Here they are:

Since its inception, psychotherapy has overwhelmingly focused on what is wrong with our stories rather than what is right with them. It has replaced the puritanical nose for sin with the psychiatric nose for abuse and discord.

Everyone looking back on the beginnings of his or her story is expected to find pain, distortion, and abuse or be accused of repression or dishonesty. As old-time religion encouraged us to ferret out sin everywhere, so we could confess and be absolved of it, so modern social science encourages us everywhere to find oppression, deformity, perversion, and misused power. This narrowness encourages us to undermine our own beginnings and to see ourselves as helpless victims with damaged personalities rather than as active characters with the power to shape our own plots.

I could create a story of my own childhood that focuses on trouble and pain. The many individual details would be true but the story would be a lie...

The point is not to tell only Pollyanna tales about one's beginnings. It is to see tales of pain in the context of a larger whole. We should marvel as much that pain coexists with and even stimulates good as we lament pain's destructive consequences. WE OUGHT NOT TO ALLOW OUR CURRENT OBSESSION WITH FINDING SOMETHING TO BLAME FOR OUR DISCONTENT BLIND US TO THE LIFE-ENHANCING POSSIBILITIES THAT FLICKER IN EVEN THE DARKEST STORIES.

I have not heard such a balanced view of personal story, not being defined by tragedies, and also to not have an "everything is great all the time" mentality, before in my life.

What do you think about his comments.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm trying to get my thoughts together. It's hard to put into words.
All I know is that the events of my life-good or bad has made me who I am. At times life seems like it's crashing in but, later (short or long) as time passes events make more sense.
When I finally realized God was a loving God it was a great relief. Growing up he seemed like a somber,strict old man. I've learned He sets boundaries (like parents) for our own good.
You talk about opening our hands so we can receive the blessings from God. It's like a child reaching for his parents to be loved,protected, helped etc...
Being a parent/grandparent as opened my eyes & heart in so many ways.
Life at times gets very wearisome.
When I really get "tired" & want to give up--I remember God is with me, he loves me. My "mission" is not complete. Even though I may not feel his presence I tell myself over & over HE is.
I try to do God's will on a daily basis & LISTEN for his guidance.

Thank-you for your blog. I think about it ALOT. (gives me much to ponder on)

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year! It's been almost a month since an entry has been made. WHY! I hope you're ok.

Jake said...

Anonymous,
i love your comments too, and i love to read the dialogue between you and vern. I am challenged so greatly by yours and his comments. I would add my own input but yall got me covered!

dont even attempt to read my blog, its not near as interesting. hah